Saturday, March 31, 2012

Poor baby!

Yesterday broke my heart! Mark had all four wisdom teeth removed yesterday, two of which were impacted and sideways. The surgery went great, but as soon as we got him home the vomit fest began! Do you know how hard it is to vomit without spitting? He would vomit and start bleeding again, once the bleeding stopped, he would vomit again and so on. I felt so helpless to make him feel better! This morning he is mostly back to normal. Only minor pain and barely any swelling. I have to say I am jealous, I was in intense pain for almost a week when mine came out! Though I am glad that he is doing so well so quickly, he has even stopped most of the pain meds.

Thursday, March 29, 2012

We have growth!

...but not enough! At today's follicle check I was happy to find out that we had growth, just not enough. The left and right ovaries are mirroring each other with an 8mm, 6.5 mm and several smaller follicles a piece. With the goal of an 18 mm follicle,we are not where we need to be.
The answer? More bravelle injections! I will have two doses for both today and tomorrow. Then a single dose per day for the following two days. The next follicle check is on Tuesday!

Monday, March 26, 2012

Last dose...take two!

Today was my last dose of least the last of the second set of bravelle injections! My next follicle check is on Thursday, so until then I guess I'll just let those follicles grow! I still feel bloated, and the injection sites are itchy....but I think it's the adhesive from the band aids causing it. I am reluctant to skip the band-aids though, because they minimize the irritation of my pant's waistline against the injection sites.

Yesterday was a sad day for me for two reasons. First, I hit 29! The last few birthdays have been hard because with each one the biological clock seems to tick a little louder! Secondly, I said goodbye to a dear friend. Yep! No more coke for me. We'll see if Mark can survive the caffeine withdrawals and the fertility drug crazies at the same time, Muahhahahaha!

Saturday, March 24, 2012

Mood swings!

A little advice? Don't start any home improvement projects while doing fertility matter how small the project! In the space of ten minutes I went from shaking with rage and yelling at Mark, to crying, to laughing with joy! The cause? Hanging new curtain rods. I would have hated to see what a bigger project would have caused!

Follicles? Ha!

Yesterday was my follicle check and things were abysmal. I don't have any numbers or measurements to report because after I was told "there's not much going on on either ovary", I was afraid to ask. That being said I have a new protocol. Let's here it for plans changing last minute! I now get to have three more doses of bravelle. I go back in to have a follicle check in a week.

Here's the thing though, that means that the earliest that I would trigger would be cycle day 15. It seems like most people trigger between CD 12-14. Anyone trigger CD 15 or later?

Friday, March 23, 2012

Waiting.....and Bravelle

It seems that when you are dealing with infertility you are are always waiting. Waiting for a cycle to begin or end, waiting for a positive, a diagnosis or a doctor. Today I sit here waiting for my appointment. Today, I get to see how my follicles are developing for the IUI. We had decided that Mark would go to work and not accompany me to this appointment, but now that it is too late, I have changed my mind. It just suddenly struck me that in a few short hours I could get a glimpse of our potential future children. I wish I had thought of it earlier so that I could have Mark there with me. Yet, if wishes were fishes I would have an ocean full of babies by now.

The Bravelle injections have been a piece of cake. I have been really surprised and pleased at how easy and painless they have been. I wish everything with infertility was so easy! I am still a little nervous about the HCG trigger shot that hopefully I will get to take this weekend. Side effects have been relatively mild so far. I have been a bit more tired recently and more easily annoyed. My lower abdomen had been feeling very bloated, but that has subsided.

Thursday, March 22, 2012

My HSG experience

This post may be a little too much information for some, but this blog is for me, and I want to record what this IUI process is like in reality. I can't do that without mentioning body parts or other personal details. Skip it if you are uncomfortable!

Yesterday I had my first Hysterosalpinogram or HSG. I have only one word to describe it.....ouch!!! That had to be the most physically painful event of my life. I laid on the exam table breathing deeply and mentally telling myself that I could get through thirty seconds of pain...anyone can get through thirty seconds of pain, right? After the first thirty seconds the dialogue turned into how I just got past thirty seconds, I could surely do thirty more. Even so, I was opening my mouth to have the doctor stop when she said something that was equally exciting and terrifying.

" We have spillage on both sides, that means no blockages...and we're done. Now let me just get all this stuff out of here."

The "here" part means my girly bits. Yeah, can we say terrifying? I was on the table imagining myself with some cyborg looking vagina at that point.

All in all, the test was a relief, however. The fallopian tubes were completely clear and ready to go. We did discover that I have an arcuate uterus. This, depending on who you ask, could be a problem. My RE was very quick to try and reassure me that an arcuate uterus is not linked to difficulties getting pregnant or carrying to term. I however asked DR. Internet this morning and he had something else to say. Apparently women that experience a loss often have an arcuate uterus, something like 6.5% of the time. However, research hasn't really been done within the general population so there is really no way to know how many people with an arcuate uterus go on to have healthy pregnancies. The other school of thought is that it is a normal variation much like attached or detached earlobes.

So I replaced one worry with another. Greeeeaaatttt.

In other news, I take my first Bravelle injection today, and of course, Mark started his new job this morning which means that I am on my own. I'm going to go poke myself with a sharp object now.

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Happy ICLW!!

...And welcome! I am looking forward to cyber visiting!

Yesterday I posted about the stress of Mark having been laid off again. Two hours after I posted, he had a new position! The relief was amazing. Things have just been falling into place for this IUI. It makes me feel hopeful, and apprehensive because I don't want to be disappointed.

My HSG is in about an hour and I am very nervous! I also took my last dose of clomid this morning and tomorrow I have my first Bravelle injection! I am feeling very bloated this cycle, which is something new, so maybe that is a good thing!

I am feeling so optimistic about this IUI. I know it sounds silly, but I followed a link to a link to a link on the internet yesterday and accidentally ended up on the webpage for a support group in my area for moms of multiples. I can't help hoping that it's a sign. I know it's silly, but I can't seem to help myself.

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

here we go again!

Mark has been laid off. Again. We have just barely recovered from the last lay off, and this time we are in the middle of an IUI cycle.

Strangely, I am not overly worried about the lack of income, I'm worried about the IUI being successful. It just seems so crazy to intentionally get pregnant (hopefully!) while we have no income. A part of me wants to just cancel the IUI and call this a clomid cycle......but, I turn 29 in less than a week. The biological clock is ticking louder than it ever has before. We have money in savings, a renter, fewer debts than last lay off and Mark might qualify for unemployment. We have always had enough, even during our last LONG stint of unemployment. It just hasn't always been easy. Adding the stress of a potential pregnancy, and the costs of the IUI seems as if it should be a bad idea. I just.......can't bring myself to feel that way. A part of me feels as if we would never get back to where we are in our fertility journey if we were to back away now. It has certainly taken us long enough to get this far!

Should we cancel this cycle to save the money.......or should we use it while we have it and hope for the best? I just don't know.

Saturday, March 17, 2012

Cyst free!

Yesterday was the day of my first baseline ultrasound. The good news is that I am completely cyst free and we are all set to go with the IUI! I did the injection training with the nurse and I am feeling a lot more confident about it. Today I started the clomid, towards the end of the week I will start Bravelle. Wednesday I have my HSG so I will also be on an antibiotic. Wish us luck!

Thursday, March 15, 2012

of ultrasounds and tree stumps.....

The time has come to talk of cabbages and kings...or rather tree stumps and ultrasounds.

Mark has had some extra time at home this past week so we have been spending the time in true spring fashion and have been hitting the yard work. Today found us pulling out tree stumps from the yard. Two down and only three more to go! Earlier in the week we were putting in stepping stones and mulching the strawberry bed. Nothing quite says spring like getting your hands dirty!

In other news, today is cycle day 1! This means that tomorrow I get the luxury of my first baseline ultrasound as well as getting my blood drawn a few times. Such is life, eh? I am nervous, but also very excited because now we can actually start progressing with cycle instead of just waiting. Patience has never been my strong point!

Thursday, March 8, 2012

Fly Guy

An insight into the mind of cats! I wonder if this is what Nutmeg is thinking when he brings us birds, mice, grasshoppers, spiders, beetles....

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

I got my drugs!!!

The drugs for this cycle just arrived and I have to admit that I was more than a little excited to find only four syringes! Yeah, for only four injections! Now it is just a matter of waiting for the right timing to begin the process. I wish my RE had already given me the protocol so that I could know what to expect, but he doesn't want to make a final decision until my baseline ultrasound in a week or so. The anticipation is killing me!

Friday, March 2, 2012

The pharmacy

Our new RE works hand in hand with a mail order Walgreen's pharmacy that has great prices on fertility drugs. I have to say that I am very excited to see my box arrive on Tuesday. It looks like the drugs for this cycle are going to run us $339.44 after the small bit that the insurance will cover. I was actually expecting the cost to be higher, so I am quite happy with that number. Of course that means that the baby fund shrunk a little this week, but at least it is progress right?